Once upon a time, I was a fiend at Super Smash Bros on Nintendo Gamecube. Almost everyone who owned that game thought they were the best as there were very few competitive scenes and all players inflated their egos by demolishing their CPU opponents on the easiest difficulty.

And then I got my wake up call. I played against some of my friends and got absolutely ruined.

Worst of all, I left my Gamecube controller at one of their houses and the dude moved to Melbourne. He pretty much defeated me in my lightsaber battle then took it away from me as if I didn’t deserve it in the first place.

That guy’s name was Jack.

And he is nowhere near as awesome as Jacks in Newtown.

Jacks Newtown is already home to lines bursting out of its door after only being open for two weeks. It’s gotten coverage on Broadsheet and is a darling amongst the Fatties Burger Appreciation Society.

With a bare bones menu featuring a cheeseburger, bacon cheeseburger and a vegetarian option; I took it upon myself to cover 66.6% of the burger menu….in one day. Yes, yes I went twice in one day just so I could properly gauge Sydney’s newest burger.

I didn’t cover all of the burgers; you get one guess as to which burger I failed to cover.

But first, the fries!

These fries are f*cking spectacular.

I went with my homie Nutellasum the second time and she declared that they were the best fries in Sydney. Super crunchy and the perfect balance between soft potato on the inside and an amazing golden coating. They were seasoned lightly and didn’t need any assistance from condiments.

So good; just wait until a cheese-smothered variation makes its debut.

Everyday’s going to be a Fryday for me.

Let me get this out of the way, Jacks Newtown is not Shake Shack. The comparison is an easy one to make; they use the same buns (Martin’s potato rolls), they sort of look the same and the patty’s fat ratio is very similar to Shake Shack’s legendary combination of chuck, brisket and sirloin.

But this is not Shake Shack, and it doesn’t have to be.

There are a few teething issues right now. The bun was a tad cold (both times) even though I had watched the cooks toast them up; they prep pretty close to opening time which doesn’t leave them much margin of error. Also, they have hundreds of eyeballs staring through the window before they’re open which just adds a ridiculous amount of pressure on their young staff.

Even though there are a few of problems; the foundation for a fantastic burger is in place. These burgers are good now, and they’re going to be amazing down the line. These rolls are used by Shake Shack for a reason. They’re super soft yet still sturdy enough to hold in the grease and oozing cheese. The patty is really good, there’s a high level of fat content in the mix which is something I approve of. Every bite comes with a melt in your mouth feeling that’s the dining equivalent of finding a shirt in your size at a boxing day sale.

Let’s add some bacon to that feeling:

I’ve heard some differing opinions on bacon in burgers. With bacon being such a dominant factor, some say it’s used to disguise a poorly made burger because you know….bacon is awesome and it can do such a thing.

Here’s my counter; adding bacon to an already good burger makes it a GREAT burger. It’s sort of like the Avengers: “Ok, we can have Iron Man take care of this but let’s hedge our bets by grabbing Thor, the Hulk, Captain America and Scarlett Johansson as well.”

The bacon is smoky, crunchy and is definitely a great addition to a very solid burger.

Here’s the TL;DR for everyone who was hoping I’d make more jokes. Please, as if I haven’t atjacked your funny bone enough over the years:

– I had some great fortune when it came to lining up for Jacks, I arrived five minutes before the lunch rush at 11.55am and five minutes before the dinner rush at 5.55pm. People started leaping out of the bushes right after I set up camp.

– One last line about Shake Shack and Jacks: there’s no need to compare LeBron James to Michael Jordan. Lebron is pretty good even if he isn’t the greatest of all time. Now, let’s give Jacks some time and see what they bring to the court down the line.

– The burger and fries are not better at Hungry Jacks, if you’re hungry, go to Jacks.

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Jacks Newtown

170 Missenden Road

Opening Hours:

Tuesday – Sunday: 5PM ’til late (follow them on Instagram for updates as things have been crazy as of late)

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