Give it t-ume, baby.

You have to admit I’m pretty fly for a blog guy.

You know what else is pretty fly? The newly revamped Bar Ume in Surry Hills.

(Disclaimer: I was invited to sample Bar Ume’s brand new menu however opinions remain my own).

Chef/owner Kerby Craig already has extensive experience with burgers having run pop ups every now and again that made burger afficianados pop-up in their pants. Bar Ume is the pop-up graduating from its freelance contract into a more prominent role.

The question is, will Bar Ume be paying a prominent role in your life considering all the burger competition in Sydney?

The answer should be yes.

…did I just start a review of a burger bar by covering their asparagus?

You bet I did!

I went to Bar Ume with my buddy Miguel from I’m Still Hungry and his insistence on trying the entire menu led to us opting for the asparagus.  My parents raised me to never order vegetables when I was out due to the fact that we bought Chinese broccoli by the bunch for 25 cents a pop and they refused to pay double digits in dollars for anything green.

Ah well, I never listened to my parents anyway and thank goodness for that. The asparagus was absolutely delicious! The smokiness imparted by the potent shichimi spices and brown butter left a very pleasant aftertaste. It’s like getting the perfect souvenir after a vacation.

I’ve had a lot of fried chicken in my life, it’s part of the reason I have a beer belly even though I’ve never had a sip of beer.

This is right up there with some of the best fried chicken I’ve ever had the pleasure of sampling. The chicken was incredibly juicy and the seasoning’s earthy nature really complemented it. It wasn’t Earth rattling crunchy by any means but it did rattle my Earth with its superb flavours and addictive quality.

I’ve had this burger one other time and I honestly didn’t remember it. Not saying the burger was bad, it’s just that I had terrible sinuses and sounded like Steve Urkel every time I said something.

With my sinuses intact, I got to eat this burger the way it was supposed to be eaten. The ebi was crunchy and super satisfying to demolish with absolutely no regard for prawn life. The synergy of the burger was excellent with each accompanying condiment doing its part to enhance the prawn katsu.

It’s cheese and bacon, you already know the harmony is real all up in this set of buns.

Speaking of; I haven’t really gone into just how good Ume’s buns are considering all the fillings it has to deal with, not once did the buns dissolve into a soggy mess like most people at the end of their first viewing of the Notebook.

It stayed strong, resilient and never wavered….like Ryan Gosling in the Notebook.

The charring of the beef patty really stands out with this burger which is quite a feat considering the natural saltiness of the cheese and bacon. It’s like Eminem having the best verse on Forever even though Drake, Kanye and Lil Wayne all spit awesome verses. Only something incredible can stand out amongst the emsemble and the beef patty is exactly that.

Hey, can we get that patty on another song? Anyone know the patty’s agent?

And here’s the second single in stores now.

Imagine if a sloppy joe and a burger made sweet, sweet love (in crazy positions all over the kitchen) and you get the Ume burger. I’ve never been the type to mince my words so I’m going to get straight to the point and say that this was f*cking amazing.

The messiness of the burger with flavours just popping off all over the place everytime you take a bite.

Simply ume-zing.

Here’s the TL;DR for everyone that saw that ume-zing line coming from a mile away:

• That asparagus was legitimately great and worth my urine smelling funky for the rest of the day
• Get the chicken and anyone of the burgers, can’t go wrong…like Rachel McAdams in the Notebook.

***

Bar Ume

478 Bourke Street, Surry Hills

Open 7 Days a week from 11am ’til late